Open letter to newbs

[bammbamm808]

Ran someone over today. Was deep in a barrel and some beginner inside paddled for the shoulder instead of hanging back and letting the wave, and me pass. I came out of said barrel and instantly ran right over the poor ignorant sot's head. Stitches. I couldn't see a thing in there, and was doing a damn fine job of surfing a pretty nice wave. The collision was easily avoidable. Some rules of the road, in no particular order:

1. The rider has the right of way. Someone who has caught a wave is doing what we're all out there to do, so respect that. Either go way around the shoulder, or hang inside/paddle up the line to let them pass unobstructed. Sure you'll eat some whitewater, but a)that's part of surfing, and b)it's still safer than encountering their board. I regularly do it at 6' Off the Wall and worse, and I daily encounter those who are unwilling to do it at 3' town. Disgusting. If you are unable to deal with a little caught inside action, you shouldn't be out there. Besides, getting hit by a board can kill you, waves probably won't.

2. It is the PADDLER'S responsibility to avoid the rider, not the other way around. Get the hell out of the way. Don't expect the surfer to surf around you. This is lame, kookish, and generally gay. Again, respect the rider and leave him/her lots of open face to have fun on, instead of weaving between idiots set up like traffic cones.

3. It is YOUR responsibility to avoid dropping in on people, not thier job to hoot/yell you off if they have the wave. Try to see who, if anyone has got an approaching wave, and if so, leave it the hell alone. Don't paddle for it, or even look at it. Go find your own wave. Do not sit on the shoulder and paddle for every wave unless someone calls you off. Eventually this approach will get you verbally or physically abused, and rightly so. If you can't get in position for a wave of your own, you need to learn how to surf.

4. Respect the locals/regulars. Every spot has em, don't aggrivate them. Play it mellow, bide your time, and you'll probably get thrown a bone before long. You wouldn't go into someone else's home uninvited, raid the fridge, and then sit on the couch eating and farting, so don't act like that at a spot that' s full of guys that "live" there. Those who say, "No one owns the ocean." are full of shit and must go surfing with blinders on every day." Go to Vland and tell it to James Labrador. Life is full of pecking orders and they are there to resolve conflicts before they start. If you don't like you place in a particular line, change lines or improve your act in order to move up in line. If you are unable/unwiliing to do either, tough shit.

5. Restpect better surfers. Mastering surfing takes many years of determined practice. Wiring a particular break takes good ocean/wave knowledge and lots of time put in. Respect those who have obviously put in their time and don't interfere with their payoff for all those dues paid. Want some of that status yourself? There's no shortcut. Put in your time and improve your skills, dummy.

6. Catching waves is about learing to read the ocean, not outpositioning other surfers. The guys that get the most/best waves are the ones that position themselves where those waves come in. They always rule the guys that expend their energy trying to snake and gain priority. Learn to read the ocean. Dealing with other surfers is a distant second.

7. If you cannot be counted on make the drop and make the wave, don't try to compete with guys who can. There are generally way more surfers out than good waves. No one likes the idiot who blows every wave. Don't be that idiot. Blow a couple, and people start dropping in, anyway. Learn to surf before using up a lot of waves with your flailings. if you are unable to improve, quit or learn to like leftovers.

8. Don't bail your board without chedking behind you. Tamayo Perry suffered a horrible head injury this winter at Pipe because some litte faggot from the Mainland bailed his board without looking. Ironically, Tamayo was only in harm's way because he was surfing without a leash and hung on to his board because he checked, and someone was behind him. The deserved beating was never meted out, unfortunately.

If you think some of this seems harsh or difficult, well, surfing is a potentially dangerous, and fairly difficult activity. If this is all too much for you to handle, you really shouldn't be surfing at all. Take up bowling, butterfly collecting or try to singlehandedly revive the Pog craze.

[red]

I got a lot of shit when I first moved here. I'd been surfing for almost 15 years but never with this many talented guys in the water all at the same time. Mahalos to all those guys who talked shit and got in my face about being in the wrong place and not giving enough effort. I surf soooo much better now because of the locals who lay down the law around here.

[surfer9joe]

Excellent!
Where was it barrelling?

[HMARK]

Well done bammer. Only a few comments, hope they get taken well.

Eventually this approach will get you verbally or physically abused, and rightly so.

Verbally, OK, take the put-downs, comments and shut the hell up, get some clue as to why you were abused, and improve. Physically abusing someone will get you in jail, or (belive me) worse sued by some fucktard lawyer.

Wiring a particular break takes good ocean/wave knowledge and lots of time put in. Respect those who have obviously put in their time and don't interfere with their payoff for all those dues paid. Want some of that status yourself? There's no shortcut. Put in your time and improve your skills, dummy.

True, dat. on the flip side are those who think they have it wired, and expect or demand respect. To me, they are worse of a danger than the newbs who are trying to follow a pecking order.

If you are unable to deal with a little caught inside action, you shouldn't be out there.

1000% true. If you cant handle the worst possible thing that can happen to you out there, dont go out.

Well done, like I said before. Running over someone not only ruins their day, but your own session as well. Not only for the STOOOPID action part, but hurting someone never really feels good.

Should be required reading before anyone takes up the sport

[olly]

can we post this at DH somewhere, maybe spray it on the side of the lighthouse? could have done with it this morning

[uncle]

Excellent, this should be printed and handed out with every new surfboard sold! right next to the "no drop in" stickers at T&C!

[LGREANZ]

AMEN !

[blahlah]

I like how your list emphasizes the important safety aspects of surfing etiquette.

My unsolicited 2 cents - on occasions where it's NOT an issue of safety, I think it's a good habit for people not to take themselves so seriously.

It's just a game/sport that we are all lucky to get to play.

[surfingcroatan]

I agree 100% man. In Virginia Beach, there are always, and I mean ALWAYS, newbs getting in the way and dropping in on you, then they completely blow it. Thats why most VB surfers drive 2 hours or more to the Outer Banks, NC. 'Cause you get all these tourists surfing for the first time, and all at the main (and just about only legal) break in town, and none of them know the rules. I cannot wait till fall so all the damn tourists are gone and the entire beach is open to ride and rip, rather than 2 whole city blocks worth of surf.

[Rocky Rockbottom]

Excellent, this should be printed and handed out with every new surfboard sold! right next to the "no drop in" stickers at T&C!

Good idea.

[Ethan]

Yo, If I dont understand something on that list, I know I should. Whats up with #8, why do you check behind you? Shouldnt you be alone on your wave? I see tons of people riding one wave in Waikiki, but theyre all newbs like me going strait at the beach. Do you really have people riding a solid wave at an angle in groups?

[red]

Waikiki doesn't count. Just go out there and have fun. If there are people out there screaming and crying chances are their egos are coming out to make up for a lack of skills.

[Bud]

Yo, If I dont understand something on that list, I know I should. Whats up with #8, why do you check behind you? Shouldnt you be alone on your wave? I see tons of people riding one wave in Waikiki, but theyre all newbs like me going strait at the beach. Do you really have people riding a solid wave at an angle in groups?

Bailing your board, meaning -unable to duck dive or turn turtle - throwing your board away and diving under to avoid being pummeled, with complete disregard for others around you.

In some rare cases, bailing your board might be considered acceptable, but always make sure no one could be hurt by your board

[Rocky Rockbottom]

Whats up with #8, why do you check behind you?

When the wave is coming at you, you are supposed to hold on to the board while the white water passes over. If you let go there is a 12 foot (shortboard) to a 20 foot + (longboard) missile pointed at whoever may be behind you. You wouldn't want to be in the target of one of those now would you? Bail in front of me and...

Waikiki doesn't count. Just go out there and have fun. If there are people out there screaming and crying chances are their egos are coming out to make up for a lack of skills.

Scroll up and reread #8.

[bammbamm808]

Yo, If I dont understand something on that list, I know I should. Whats up with #8, why do you check behind you? Shouldnt you be alone on your wave? I see tons of people riding one wave in Waikiki, but theyre all newbs like me going strait at the beach. Do you really have people riding a solid wave at an angle in groups? :shock:

Little thick today? Reread it with brain in gear.